It looks like next week will be a trip to TO. While there is a part of me looking forward to it (and that is the part the will emerge once board the flight), there is another part of me that really really really does not want to go.
Phil has his last week of school next week and has 2 exams - his hardest module and the course the final. So of all the weeks for me to travel while he is back to school, it is the worst week. We talked it over and it makes more sense for the boys to go to my parents rather than my Mom come up.
I don't begrude my parents the time with the boys - I trust them completely. But I feel like I am shirking my responsibilites as a parent and a wife. It would be one thing if I was a single parent or our situation was such that we needed me to have this job. But I am not and we don't. I choose this job because I like it. So now my parents are having to pick up the slack created by my choice.
As well, I don't want to leave the boys - right now I am craving my time with them immensely. They change so much every day. Adam makes me laugh with his stories and his ennie meane miny moe. Alex loves being tummy tickled and eating my bagel in the morning. I will miss that.
This trip is another nail in the coffin for this type of work - it is not a good enough trade for me.
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